Here’s how at exactly 08h44 on the 28th October 2020 (a year ago), Nora Madibana and I both became first time parents to a handsome little boy. The EDD moved from the 4th to the 2nd November then to the 31st October. The fancy equipment helps only to get the estimated day out but can’t predict when the actual day will be. So, this was not planned at all.

Our anxiety levels were high with the anticipated birth but my little sister was on standby from Johannesburg while I continued work from this side (Rustenburg, located in the North West Province). I must say, it was the loneliest week of my life and when I got that late call from my sister on the 27th, that they had been admitted – I knew right there and then that our world was about to change forever.

I had planned an early underground shift at work on the day, there was a new safety campaign being launched So I had to take part and contribute so I did manage to have an early rest – something I hardly ever do of late. After the call, I dozed off and told myself I will drive off either first thing in the morning or after work. I think I was still in a state of shock.

We were on a waiting period for the new medical aid we switched to so we both had to cover the maternity costs on our own. Thankfully, the guys at The Birthing Team programme came to our rescue. Google them, I highly recommend their services. It’s the reason why our son was born in Joburg. I am told that the Johannesburg branch of The Birthing Team has since shut down, I really don’t know much about the cause, if it’s true, then it’s a big dent to newly expectant parents hoping to make use of their services. They really offered us a great all-inclusive package covering all pre-natal visits, check-ups and delivery costs.

So I decided not to go to work. I was aware that my time at work was going to be disrupted at anytime when I got the indication that it was almost time and that late night call from my sister triggered it. I alerted them of my decision and the reasons thereof, which they understood and wished us well for.

To my work colleagues who were thoughtful & understanding during this time – I missed out critical meetings on Mondays and from time to time as a result of the regular trips to and from Johannesburg for check ups I had to do with my life partner. They ensured that the department’s role did not go disrupted while I was on and off work. They all know who they are. Thank you.

I got into the car, I cannot recall whether there was a curfew or not (this as the country is still in lockdown restrictions as a result of Covid-19) but it was an emergency so I left for Johannesburg. I remember how careful I was during that drive as it was the wee hours of the night going to the next day and I did not want any unnecessary hiccups or delays. When I got there, he (our little one) was not yet out (thankfully) and the sisters on duty that morning reassured us that by around 10am, the birth will have taken place. This was from them measuring the rate of dilation.

Covid-19 was still rampant but the infection rates at the time where not high. I was well aware that dads were not allowed entry into the labour ward as a result but the rules were slightly adjusted and I only had to produce a negative test to be given access to the ward. As soon as I got to the hospital I got that horrible swab into my nostrils and had to wait for results. Is there no other, more comfortable way of doing this? I was then offered a spare bed to rest while awaiting for the results as I had arrived in the wee hours of the early morning. Watching my life partner lying on that bed with our little one on the way in great pain was not a good sight at all but I told myself that as long as I was there with them and at that the time, was the best I could do to somehow alleviate the pain.

As the big moment loomed, we were then moved from the waiting area to the labour ward where we waited some more. I don’t know how may times I asked to go the bathroom at that stage until the big moment arrived. It was surely about to go down.

I then stood there amazed at the work that the Midwife, Sister Lesego and her team had done right in front of my eyes. I have never witnessed anything so life changing before and it’s a memory I will never forget. What a celebration it was in the room when he made his first cry!

Looking back, the only thing I will change from the entire event, besides the Covid-19 test pain I had dreaded, is when I was asked to cut the cord, I refused (I was gobsmacked at the time and not at a point where I could think straight). I wish I had been brave enough to agree to it. Maybe next time. I hope.

To Elias our maternity shoot photographer from Photo da Best – You’re indeed the best at what you and I can’t wait to show our son these photos one day when he’s older. Thank you for capturing the moments and emotions so beautifully. We were late for the shoot on the day but as a professional, you understood and still offered us a phenomenal service. Apologies for this overdue post which puts a spotlight at your stunning work, and I am grateful that you understand.

To Kabelo Madibana, who helped us out on the photoshoot day. You did a good job coordinating everything – it’s your work too. The props, change of attires, especially for Nora, and moral support. And to Nelisiwe Mzili, I thank you and Ma for taking them to the hospital on that night on my behalf. I am forever grateful. To our families and friends, our son has so many wonderful aunts and uncles, it’s overwhelming – for the outpouring love, support and guidance shown to us during this time. We are honoured.

With my birthday falling on the 29th of October, yes – the following day, I kid you not and this year, these milestone days fell on a weekend and we then felt it appropriate to go away as a family for the very first time. What a challenge it was to travel around, exploring the beautiful Hartbeespoort area with them but for all of that. I can do it all over again. And I look forward to mastering travelling around with our little one from now onwards.

Here’s to a great era to our new family with our first year milestone over and done with, our hearts are full and grateful at the little human being God has entrusted us in this world. The 28th of October will forever be our favourite day of every year.

Happy one year milestone, little one. Mommy and Daddy love you so much.