Driving, at times can be an extreme sport, even for those of us who have never made use of the Kyalami grand prix racetrack.
You wake up refreshed and ready to take on the world and the minute you get into your car and drive outside, it’s a completely different picture altogether. After listening to one drive time show in the country recently, hearing them talk about some unwritten road rules in the country (see the article in the reference), I immediately thought of expanding the idea with this article.
We (hopefully should) all go through the dreaded K53 road driving rule book and its grilling multiple choice questions test. I don’t want to do that ever again but for some odd reason, the minute one gets a pass for their driver’s or learner’s license tests, the rules (some of them) not all, get lost in translation or application. Does this only happen to me or most of us? This is in no way a call to contravene the rules. Rules are rules!
Like for instance, when last have you done that 360-degree observation before making your move from the stop sign? Or done a thorough pre-trip inspection of the car before getting into it? What about when last you approached a stop sign (or is it a yield sign), did you come to a complete halt and have your hand brake up and changed the gear lever (for manual cars of course) back to neutral? Who still does this? Come on now, don’t be shy…
While we’re at it. I once misplaced my driver’s license card one weekend while driving to a different province to visit family, without it. And this was by mistake as I always keep my license card with me all the time. So, you can imagine how new this feeling of panic and anxiety was for me.
Then I googled what I need to know or do when I am caught without a license card in Mzansi by an official and the findings were somewhat scary and a bit backward if you ask me. Is it not high time for us to have driver’s license cards and the information thereof digitized? Why can’t a police officer simply scan one’s ID number on some fancy, portable device to have it retrieve details – whether the driver is legit or not on the road? Cut out the drama and fuss? A whole fine can be imposed for leaving a small card at home in Mzansi, in 2023. Well in the UK, it’s not much of a hassle if one forgets their driver’s license card at home, I so wish we too can move swiftly with the times already. We are seriously behind. Thankfully, I never got the chance to defend my case and see what options were waiting for me.
But I digress.
Here’s a list of what appears to be more confessions of a Mzansi driver, in no particular order.
1. Seatbelt.
Putting on a seatbelt is not only a safety feature but a requirement for most modern cars these days, who beep and beam with noise to remind the driver to simply do the right thing. How annoying is that! A whole sound in your car to remind you, to do that right thing for your health? Car manufacturers do go all out for such features but what is commonly done? Strap it on and have your back against it while at that. Some drivers even have this set up permanently on their cars, it’s scary. What about getting onto public transport like a bus or taxi? Quite rare to have passengers putting these on for their safety, well without having their heads bitten off by the drivers who may find this act offensive, I wonder why. Bottom line, seatbelts are there for a reason and should be used accordingly to prevent life threatening accidents when used correctly, so do the right thing and have a figure tight relationship with your seatbelt.
2. Hazards – Thank you.
When someone is in a hurry and there only a two-way lane and you decide to move to the yellow lane, the car passing you may hit hazards after passing you to say “Thanks”. Not that there’re going to take an emergency stop soon. Any kind gesture done on the road for another motorist is credited by this act in Mzansi. Some even used the bright option flashlight to say thanks. Funeral processions also tend to have cars having their hazards on as a warning to other motorists for their temporary right of way.
3. Bright flashing lights – speed cops ahead, dim your brights, go right ahead.
Flashing car lights in Mzansi have multiple meanings, you just need to be in tune with the context and surroundings at the time of their use. It may mean, you can go ahead, if stopping at an intersection and none of you are sure who stopped first. On an on-coming two-way lane, when the other driver does this, there’s a warming of a possible road closure or speed camera ahead so slow down and be cautious in other ways. Also, on the oncoming traffic, if the other driver has their bright lights on, you flashing back yours to them simply means, you’re alerting the other driver to turn down theirs as they are obscuring your view. Talk about being multi-disciplinary in approach and meaning. I still am not sure what a flashing light means just before a car behind you overtakes, I’ve also seen that gesture being used. Any pointers or confessors on this one?
4. Orange traffic light – pick up your acceleration!
When the traffic lights turn amber, it often means slow down or be cautious. When does it mean, you need to speed up and avoid the robots quickly turning red? This is a risky act that needs to be nipped in the bud.
5. Fast lane – don’t be a slow poke on it.
You will be forced out of the fast lane if you’re too slow in a double lane road. Please make way or risk being stared at or bright light flashed.
6. Speed cop ahead. Be on your absolute best behaviour.
When you see a speed cop ahead, do yourself a favour and be a good boy/girl almost instantaneously. Hold a Bible close to you while at it. Don’t give them attitude or you will be in serious trouble. Courtesy and respect are the operatives.
7. The hooter.
This may mean different things in Mzansi. One is a warning to move out of the way. Two is to greet someone along the road. Three, if it’s prolonged, it can be used by the bridal party to signal ‘here comes the bride!”. But if you drive like a mad person in general, expect a long hooter to annoyingly come your way.
8. Taxis have the right of way – always.
Be careful the next time you drive in front of a taxi as it may stop abruptly at any time, without a warning or may lead you to a restricted driveway that’s not an approved driveway. This is usually due to us as passengers in the taxi, when we are running late for work or when we decide to just get off at the next turn for instance. Taxis do tend to make their own path. Also, don’t waste time trying to argue with them, just don’t mind them at all, all of that arguing and logic inquest will be in vain. Simply find your peace and make sure you get to your destination in one peace.
9. Driver’s license test – a need for a re-test?
Every 5 years, we all get to visit a driver’s license testing station to renew that all important license card permitting us to drive on the road. It is such a tedious process with queues and a lot of waiting. All of this for an updated photo of yourself on that card, an eye test and new five-year date for the next period of its validity – all of this, mind you – is not for free at all. Then there’s a waiting period for when the actual card gets issued (a temporary license will be issued so long) and you need to make your way back to the testing station. On this point I humbly ask, is this really a renewal of one’s ability to be fit and road worthy? Or will a re-test be too much of an admin hassle? How many of us ‘experienced’ drivers will pass that driver’s test? Here’s something to ponder about.
10. Learner driver in front of you – don’t lose your cool.
Please don’t lose your patience at the sight of a car with a learner driver sticker on, driving in front of you. Please – don’t be that horrible person. Not everyone grew up in front of a steering wheel so the impatience seen on drivers at the sight of a learner driver, must stop with immediate effect. On that same note, drivers who aren’t yet ready to be independent on the road, should also do the courteous and right thing; by having the learner driver sticker on. Do not take chances.
11. Safety first.
Be safety conscious on the roads and don’t let your guard down. Always obey the road rules and remember, that just because someone else or the majority may be doing something wrong, it doesn’t make it right. Remember your basic K53 road rules, if you can recall them.
On that note: Have you ever felt guilty, stopping at an intersection and although the robot is green, while the left or right turn arrows indicator is still off, and you’re standing there, waiting for your turn and there’s no on-coming traffic? This happens to me all the time.
Well, don’t feel bad. Waiting for your right of way green arrow signal on the robot, is the right thing to do.
Do you have any road confessions of your own? Do pray tell – I promise to keep this safe between us.
References
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